Dates

Why Do Women Cheat?

tileahIf you’re a television junkie such as me, think back a few years to Season 3 of the popular HBO series Sex and the City when Carrie did the unthinkable, she cheated on Aidan. 0__0 My jaw dropped, I couldn’t breathe (yes, I’m dramatic at times) but how dare she do such a horrid act to someone who loved her so deeply.

Aidan was your ideal mate. Entrepreneur, hard working, charming, still believed in chivalry, he sometimes looked a little rough around the edges but sexy nevertheless.  Carrie came first in his life…well alongside his dog Pete of course, but you get the point.  Aidan was all about Carrie and Carrie “appeared” to be all about Aidan.  So what happened?

I often wonder when I hear scenarios like this, why do people cheat on people that love them so much? How can you constantly ask for a “good” man (ladies, you know we are always praying to God to send us a “good” man,lol) and some of us don’t know how to handle them once we get him.  Why is this sometimes the case? According to an article I read on the Huffington Post women cheat for 5 reasons:[1

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The Man I was Dating Got Engaged to Someone Else…But I love him, By Guest Blogger

tileahI still remember my puppy loves; and if I didn’t, my mother and brother would gladly remind me. I remember in 8th grade talking that “I love him” talk. I wasn’t “allowed” to date until 16, but as long as my parents didn’t see us walking home from school together, and I picked up on the ½ ring before my parents when he called the house, they would never know (Life before cell phones). 15 years later, its turns out, they knew (Parents always know). That “relationship” ended when I saw him let another girl wear his jacket during recess, because “she was cold”. #Young&Dumb

I remember standing at my locker, day dreaming looking at a picture saying “I’m going to marry that man”. Mind you, I was a sophomore in high school talking about marrying this boy that I was secretly dating (because I wasn’t 16 yet). We talked on the phone every night, and saw each other as much as we could; being that we didn’t go to the same school of lived in the same town. Our families were friends, so my parents didn’t question when we would go to the park to “play basketball” and when I would go over to visit. That “relationship” ended when my father turned my phone off.  He tried calling me, I didn’t answer the phone, he took it personal, and we went our separate ways. #Misunderstanding

My two best friends were dating cousins, and rather than me being a 5th wheel they decided to hook me up with one of their boyfriend’s friends. I was a senior in high school: president of my senior class, student council, a student representative for the Board of Education, Miss Goody Two-Shoes, and he was considered the local “thug”… But I loved him. I was called in for meeting by my Assistant Principal and coaches tell me to break up with him; not to mention my parents didn’t care for him, but that made me “love” him even more. It was me and him against the world. The college I chose to attend was based on the distance I would be from him. Our relationship lasted a year and a day: He stood me up on our anniversary, and then the next day when he came to pick me up he broke up with me. #NoWords Read more

Flirting with a Purpose: Tips to Flirting

IGirls just want to have funs flirting the way to life? Is it natural game?

Giggling, laughing, batting your eyes, and sweet compliments, are just a few of many gestures people use to flirt.  I was watching Girl Code on MTV television one day and the topic of flirting was discussed. It was so hilarious, yet so true.  Do people really flirt without realizing it? Have you ever found yourself overly smiling or laughing at someone? Or trying to find ways to be around that person? I am sure you have. We all have. We all have flirted in one form or another; the only difference would be the purpose of the flirt.

Are you flirting to get a date, ahead in your career, or to just see if you still ‘got’ it? People flirt for many different reasons. Some people flirt and do not even realize it until the person their talking to makes a rash movement. Has flirting become such a natural and common instinct that we all do it and not even realize it? When dealing with the opposite sex or someone you’re attracted to, how do you handle flirting with them? What is your approach? Here are a few tips to flirting:

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Do finances affect your relationship?

When you get into a relationship with someone, majority of the time this is determined based off your attraction, physical chemistry, and how well you two get along. But, what about finances? Does this play a determining factor when choosing a significant other? Now, please do not confuse this with a “gold digger” mentality. I am not asking if your beau MUST be rich before you date them. However, I am asking do you take heed to their spending habits, their financial planning, and credit score?tileah

I was listening to the radio this morning and the topic of finances and marriage came up and it was said that more couples in their 20’s to early 30’s discuss finances PRIOR to getting married. Do you agree? Do you think you should discuss finances before you marry someone? I personally think these are good questions to ask/ consider before marriage and depending where you are in your relationship, this might be a good time to discuss as well while dating.

Understanding how someone handles money individually is a good indicator on how they will handle a joint account situation. If your beau is spending more money than income and purchasing more liabilities instead of assets, this could be a red flag for later on.  Speaking to someone that you potentially will marry about finances is an important topic.  When you get married, you expect to mesh things and build from there. If you have a mate that doesn’t understand that concept and would rather purchase sneakers instead of paying the rent, well, you may have a big issue on your hands. Communicating up front can help alleviate some of this concern and it will allow you to understand your partner on a different level.

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Never Should Have Loved Me: How to Deal with The Past

dont find love wait for love to find youYou never should have loved me You never should have touched me, You never should have Never should have told me you loved me and you would never leave me. 'Cause everything that you would do It made me fall in love with you, Until you left and you made that mistake Now I can't take you back if I wanted too”

Have you ever listened to a song and it felt as if the artist was singing your life story? R&B music artist, Ashanti spoke truth with her new song Never Should Have. The song is telling an EX that they should have never made her fall in love if they didn’t have intentions of catching her. The lyrics are deep and I am sure many can relate. I want you to think about a past relationship that you wanted to work so badly, how did it make you feel when it didn’t? Like many, it is not a pleasant feeling. Emotions are high and you are left wondering, ‘what happened?’

Dealing with the past can never be an easy task especially if it happens to pop back up in your present. Out of sight out of mind works wonders but what happens if it comes back to you? What do you do if your past reappears? Ashanti made a powerful statement with her lyrics... "until you left and you made that mistake, now I can’t take you back if I wanted to” WOW that’s powerful.

So your past is back, do you let them into your present? This is a question many people struggle with trying to answer when an EX reappears. Those warm fuzzy butterfly feelings may reappear, the day dreaming of “back in the day” and reminiscing of old times may occur. But as you sit and think of all the positive things, a light bulb goes off and now all of the reasons why it DIDN’T work begin to replay in your mind. Now what? Here are a few tips with dealing with an EX:
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