5 Lessons on How to Give a Good READ

shadeAfter watching my guilty pleasure, Real Housewives of Atlanta (RHOA) last night I was cracking up over the concept of being “READ”. Now, for those who do NOT know what a “READ” is, let me explain: to READ someone is to CHECK them, put them in their place, basically to let them know you are NOT the one and to NOT even try it!  #BOOM

Now, as Cynthia from RHOA puts it, “when you look better, you read better.” You have to look good while giving and receiving a good READ. And I agree, especially if you’re receiving the READ. Looking busted while receiving a READ is just not a desirable appearance. BUT if your face is beat to the Gwads, and your outfit is Flawless, well then you take that READ and twirl, ESPECIALLY, if you do not have anything else to say.

Let’s be clear, there are rules and regulations to a good READ:

Lesson 1: Make sure your READING the right person. It’s nothing cute about READING someone who didn’t start the shade throwing. Know your audience. Focus that READ to the person that deserves it the most. Target the peanut gallery folks later.

Lesson 2: You must be quick.  Speaking fast and thinking fast are a must in a READ. You can’t be stuttering and taking breaks in between a READ. A READ is meant to be quick, fast, and READ from A to Z in just a few breaths.  Be swift on your toes.

Lesson 3: Enunciate every word and build the voice intensity. You have to let them KNOW this is what it is and this is what it’s not.

Lesson 4: Be ready for the comeback. Most READs do not end without some type of backlash. Make sure you have your verbal ammo in place to check them right back. #POW

Lesson 5: Use your whole body to interpret your thoughts. It’s nothing shadier than a person Reading someone from A to Z and they have their whole body into it. Sometimes a roll of the eyes, the point of the finger, or the neck twitch is necessary to get a point across. It adds a zest to the READ.

Bonus Lesson 6: Know when you’ve been READ. Some people are oblivious to the point that they just got READ. Actually, I don’t think they’re oblivious I just think they’re in denial. Either way, don’t’ question it. Just accept it, learn from it, and move on. Hell, take notes.

Well, darling I liiiiivvvveee for a good READ, some people deserve it. The shade is real out in these streets. Have you seen all those palm trees lately? Sometimes a good READ is a necessity for (wo)mankind.  So on that note, make sure you pay special attention to Lesson 1 and know your audience. As you’re out there blocking all that shade remember, ‘when you look better you read better”


Tileah Aisha

*Photo Credit* collegecandy.com